It will be my raw emotions during the most difficult time in my life. I am sharing so that maybe just from part of my story and part of my journey will help someone. Weather they have gone through anxiety, depression, anger, hurt, separation, or even a divorce. I want my life to be for the glory of Christ. Sharing my story I believe is how I can do that. My life phrase has been for years "The Struggle is Part of the Story". I even have the bible tattooed on my foot to represent that phrase and to remind me that my testimony is for the good news of the gospel.
Part 1 is an intro explaining part 2 but it shows where I got my phrase that comforted me during my separation and divorce. So here it goes...
I was going through the biggest trail of my life. My marriage was ending. It had been falling a part for years but now it was ending. I was left alone, abandoned, and scared. I didn't know what I was going to do. I had spent the last couple months learning a new life on my own and taking care of myself I finally was feeling "normal". I had been feeling heat rise in my chest at certain thoughts and triggers. The thought of S leaving me, the situation between us, when I wanted to contact him and couldn't or when I missed him. The heat would be so intense. I could hear my heartbeat in my head, and feel my cheat pound. I couldn't focus on anything but the pain and the heat. I felt the fire inside me. I felt like I was dying (apparently that is just called a panic attack).
My sister M had asked for prayer for me during her bible study. Some members of this study knew who I was and some had never met me before. There was this girl Jene there and while they were praying she had a vision of me. It was exactly what I was feeling.
"You were standing in a field. It was covered in dead underbrush and trees. Basically perfect fuel for a wild fire. You was trying to contain what essentially was a campfire but because of the dryness which surrounded you it quickly became out of control. But, once all the dryness and things which were dead were burned it provided fertile soil for new life to be born. Out of what seemed like death came life anew. And that is just what I heard God continue to whisper, "Out of Death WILL come life."
Jene had no idea who I was or even what I was going through at the time she had this vision. My sister simple just asked for an unspoken prayer request for me. God did an amazing thing that night. He gave me soooo much hope through this vision that he gave to a complete stranger. I clung to this vision more times than I could count. My dear friend painted me Shelia painted me the vision that is wonderful.
So it is from The Struggle is Part of the Story this blog is now taking place and because Out of Death Will Come Life
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